Three months ago was April 20, 2010. A lot happened that day.
Four people I know, one good friend and three guys that I have dated, all celebrated a birthday. April 20 is the cusp between Aries and Taurus.
On April 20th, I was optimistic, motivated, passionate and raring to go.
Unbeknownst to me at the time, April 20th was also the day the leak in the Gulf first started.
Taurus is a fixed-earth sign. How ironic. It was more like the day the earth broke, punctured and spewing toxins. Little did anyone know then that three months later, the fate of this situation would still be indeterminate.
Today is July 20, 2010. It is the birthday of a friend, new to me this year and marking 50 years for him. And today, another friend lost a father.
Today, and as I write this, my father is being operated on. If you read this blog entry back in January, you know the beginning of that story. [While editing and before posting this, I heard from my sister that he is out of surgery and doing fine. All is looking good at this time.]
Today is also the day I broke down and made an appointment with the vet to have my little Notte looked at. This latest skin thing is not looking very good and is not going away on its own.
In the past 90 days, my blog writing has really bounced all over the place. Some messages have been direct, even harsh, while others have been soft and encouraging. A lot has happened in these 90 days, and yet, some things are just the same. Well, not really. Even the things that have not changed in a visible way feel differently.
The last blog I wrote was not what I intended to write when I sat down. Of course, they never quite are. But these days, writing these entries is more significant to me than ever.
In these 90 days, I have considered writing another book many times, each time with a different idea for a different book. Yesterday, I actually started one. We’ll see if I can catch a thread of determination to complete one. Maybe I’ll just write and put some here and some there and just let it grow organically. I’ll get back to you on that one.
I do want to touch on something related to the last blog entry. More and more, I read of the Powers That Be. That seems to be a hot topic in the alternate press. It is like every conspiracy theory, every world problem has as its origin these mythical (or not) Powers That Be. Even I believe they exist because it all makes perfect sense. But then again, I can also see another scenario making perfect sense that excludes them.
And then I see a higher perspective that neither requires them to exist or not. You see, the Powers That Be, often written as PTB, are a perfect substitute for another PTB – Projections that Breathe.
Now projection is not a new concept to me. I have thought about it a lot over the years of studying metaphysics. That along with perception, which is really the same thing. I have often come to the realization that perception is reality (subjectively). If one perceives something to be so, it might as well be true because that one will create his/her reality around the perception. Until they don’t.
Perception is subjective. It is how the subject sees the world around him. Projections feel objective because now there is someone or something to blame outside of ourselves. It gives us an out.
The PTB are the ultimate scapegoat. If there are these uber powerful men and women that secretly control all major governments from their mystical lairs, then there is little we can do about it. We don’t even know who they are. Supposedly, they control both sides of any duel. Makes sense because if they are uber powerful, they would set everything up so that they could never lose – the ultimate hedge.
The interesting thing is so much of metaphysical writing, be it blogs, channeling, or what have you all seem to mention the PTB these days. Many claim that they are about to fail – yeah, give it another month, and its over. They’ve been in control for eons, but they are just about to fall over. No, seriously, one more month now. I know I’ve said it for years now, but really, one more month and their done.
Sounds a lot like Disclosure. Yeah, any day now our skies are going to fill up with uncloaked spacecraft from a number of “alien” cultures who are visiting from various planets and star systems. The fact that it was supposed to happen “any day now” four years ago and is still eminent, has me again skeptical. [For the record, I totally believe there are visitors and that it is even known by some. I just question whether Disclosure of this is eminent.]
And yet, I now see what all of this is about in the collective unconscious, and I think it is VERY positive.
What we have is another “religion” that has emerged. Disclosure with us being saved by highly intelligent, technically advanced beings from elsewhere is the comparable situation to the second coming of Jesus Christ, or the Rapture. The PTB are the new Devil, the source of all evil on earth, and soon to be defeated.
Okay, so why would yet another variation of an old story be good news? Well, this time, all of earth is united. If our savior is from elsewhere, they are here to save ALL of us, not just the Christians or the Jews, or the Muslims, or the Buddhists.
And the PTB cross all nations, all races, both genders. They are supposedly above all publicly known structures and control all the great armies and banks.
It doesn’t matter whether these are complete myth, completely true, or some combination, the fact that they are growing as concepts is an indication that the collective is moving towards a unity beyond race, beyond gender, beyond nationality and beyond any other type of division. Sounds good to me!
Of course, the realist side of me has an additional perspective.
In recent years, I have read about a reality split coming in 2012. In this view, both Armageddon and Nirvana are coming and we individually get to choose. Of course, when I read of this, it sounds rather fantastic (the variation of fantasy). It sounds too unlike reality to be real. It is hard to imagine that this current reality we are so used to will unravel enough in 2 years to create something that strange.
But at the same time, I do see where this idea is coming from. Maybe the suggestion is complete fantasy, but it could be another metaphor.
More and more, it feels like everything we read is suspect. We have been lied to and fooled too many times to just buy what we see on the news or read on the Internet. Hoaxes, lies, and scams are as common and spam and junk mail.
I think that at this stage of development, we are being asked to discern. We are being asked to use our intuition and to trust what we feel over what we think or see.
I personally feel that we are evolving in ways that are extraordinary. You might think telepathy (the ability to read thought) and empathy (the ability to read feeling) are fantasy, but I have experienced and witnessed enough of both to have a high degree of belief in them. And then there is energy healing and manifestation, not to mention communication with non-physical beings and/or our own higher or super-consciousness.
All of these concepts from the previous paragraph are a bit fantastic, but after years of immersion, they feel more real every day. And if they are real, let’s just suppose, then they all require a belief in INTERNAL information over external information to work. None of these are demonstrable beyond a doubt, at least not yet. That’s because they are all composed of non-physical constituents. The non-physical cannot be proved by the physical because the physical is a subset of the non-physical. That would be like the spleen trying to prove to the bladder that they both live within a human body, and that there are millions of other spleens and bladders in human bodies (not to mention other animals) all walking, swimming or flying around on a big blue and green sphere. There would be no way the spleen could prove this to the bladder inside of their confined little realm.
And so, I am going to start training myself to see the PTB as the Projections that Breathe and know that they are walking around all of the time. My perspective tells me what each and every one of them means in my life and I can either learn from them, or fight with them, love them, or hide from them. Doesn’t really matter.
What I do know is that on this day 50 years ago, someone was born. And on this very day, someone passed. And that some 42 years ago, I was just a baby and some unknown day in the future, I will be in another place that I just don’t really or fully know what it will be like just yet. I won’t take this body with me and every moment of this life will be nothing but a memory stored somewhere or possibly forgotten.
So today, I will balance my skepticism and belief. I will think about my Dad, and my friend’s Dad and both of my friends. And I will cherish my little boy (Notte) and my little girl (Kali). I will run some energy (for all of them) and contemplate/meditate/pray in my own quirky way. And I will continue to explore ways to feel better more often.
And I will write…