Skip the Apology

Skip the apology. Don’t say you’re sorry…you don’t need to be forgiven.

We’ve all been there. Maybe you said something, maybe you did something, either way, five minutes later, you regret it. Regret is feeling as if you’ve done something wrong. Or maybe your actions were innocent, but they blew up in your face. Maybe you put yourself in pain or hurt someone else.

Life happens. You might think it was bad luck, you might believe in Karma—either way, we’ve all been in those spots.

Religions like to talk about “wrong-doing.” Some spend an awful lot of time preaching about “atoning for one’s sins.” In my opinion, they’re only half right. But I’ll get to that in a moment.

So let’s say you did something someone might call a sin. Whether it be intentional or not matters not (for this discussion). All that matters is that you are now in a state of regret.

Regret serves a purpose, but a very, very short one. Regret—intellectually—is nothing more than the realization that something did not work out well. Regret—emotionally—emphasizes the point, which is simply your inner guidance telling you to now turn away from what didn’t go well, and turn towards what is wanted.

When you’re told to atone, the dictionary says:

Atone = to make amends.

Amends is defined as reparation or compensation. But amend is defined as to improve or correct. So a higher definition of atone is this:

Atone = to make amendments = to make adjustments, changes, corrections.

If you reached regret, you have the information you need to get started. You understand that something is not right (it’s not the way you want it to be). You might not know the full solution, but you do know that you want it. Your negative feelings of regret tell you that.

If you stay with regret, it can get worse. Regret, you see, is focusing on the problem, the sin, the wrong-doing, the mistake…in other words, the past. If you stick with regret, you might slide into guilt. If you stick with guilt, you can slide further into things like self judging, self loathing, or maybe even shame.

Some teach (preach) atonement synonymously with apologizing. They say you must compensate for your wrong-doing…you must pay for your sins…you must ask (them) for forgiveness.

But this teaching loses sight of the high meaning of atonement…making an adjustment. When you make an adjustment, you are moving forward. The past is over. The journey is from here forward.

If you use atonement the way it was intended (as guidance from spirit), you can follow this path rather quickly:

atonement—>attunement–>attainment—>achievement–>abundance

Another view of the above is this:

Atonement allows attunement allows attainment allows achievement allows abundance.

Atonement = making adjustments.

Attunement = alignment = harmonizing–tuning one’s vibration with one’s Higher Self, one’s desires, one’s true intentions, God/Goddess/All-That-Is. It is worth mentioning that your Higher Self is God/Goddess/All-That-Is, because it is already attuned to Source.

Attainment = reaching a goal—realizing a desire. Attaining, which is based on reaching, is a much better word than obtaining, which implies getting or gaining through effort (in other words: trying). A previous post already showed us that: Anxiety is being in a trying place. Instead of trying, reach for your goals. Reaching implies stretching, growing, expanding, and becoming more than you were.

Achievement, which is very close to attainment, simply illustrates that what was gained was desired to begin with. I am remembering the saying, “Experience is what you got when you didn’t get what you wanted.” Well, “Achievement is what you get when you attain what you sought to begin with.”

Abundance is the natural result from following this path. Simply put, to achieve any desire, all that is needed is atonement…meaning attunement. You might not know all of the steps to take right now, but when you make a step that is away from your goal, you will know it. Simply atone, attune, and step again.

Now, doesn’t this sound more like the guidance God/Goddess/All-That-Is would say to a loved child? Wouldn’t it make sense that all-loving Source would provide a clear path for the attainment of your desires?

It may be another eon of time before the idea of sin fades away. So be it. When you feel regret, reach for atonement, which is simply attunement.

If your car makes a funny noise, you take it in for a tune-up (attunement). You don’t publicly shame it on Facebook. You don’t use peer-pressure to coerce it into complying. You don’t damn it to hell. You don’t throw rocks at it, saying it deserves to be smashed. You simply make adjustments. [Or maybe you trade it in for a new one. That works too! :-)]

By the way,  before you venture down the above path at all, make sure your regret is actually yours. In other words, don’t wear other people’s thoughts about what’s right and wrong. Their morality is theirs. You have your own. Feeling guilty because you think you did something wrong is very different than feeling guilty because someone else told you (or implied) that you did something wrong (by their rules).

Play around with this and let us know what you think by leaving a comment, if you’re so inclined.

And for the record, if it will make you feel better to apologize, then by all means, do that. This post is not about telling you what to do, merely about giving you something to think about.